Here in San Francisco, homosexuality is generally treated as socially acceptable.

This is nationally considered a “gay-friendly” city, and for the most part, people are not uncomfortable with the lifestyle.

How then, one might ask, is the newly recognized phenomenon of “down-low” men even possible? Men on the down low (DL for short), many African American but of other nationalities as well, have girlfriends, wives and even children who are kept totally in the dark about their partner’s sexual preferences.

These men have sex with other men in secret, while keeping their heterosexual lifestyle for family, friends and business associates to see.

What scares many health professionals about men on the down-low, they say, is the high rate of HIV infection among heterosexual women, and the possible connection to male partners engaging in unsafe sex without their partner’s knowledge.

That is a tough pill to swallow for many women who are under the impression that they are involved in honest, monogamous relationships.

Much of the controversy and uproar over DL men may not have to do with homosexuality per se, but with unsafe sex practices and dishonesty.

While there are communities that frown upon the gay lifestyle and men who would rather not live with the stigma of being labeled homosexual, there is no excuse for the unprotected sex that is associated with down-low men.

We live in a time and place hit hard by HIV and AIDS. While one cannot condone lying, if men choose to keep their sexual preferences a secret there isn’t much their partners can do about it.

The only thing a partner can do is be protected. Risky sex practices are known to increase the risk of sexually transmitted diseases. Everyone, without exception, should know this.

Men on the down-low know this, and to disregard it is a very selfish and potentially dangerous thing to do. No one can stress enough the importance of protection, and in situations where honesty is optional, protection is the only way to defend oneself from disease.