It’s 9:30 on Saturday night and Castro’s Metro Bar isn’t busy yet. The tables along the wall are all full, but there is still plenty of room to walk through the bar. In an hour or so the place will be packed and patrons will have to force their way through sweaty strangers to make it across the room. A corner table is occupied by a large group of friends, laughing heavily and leaning in close to hear each other over the steady beat of 1980s dance music. Their dark corner is suddenly illuminated by flashing lights as the group looks around startled, trying to find the source of the violation.

Standing in their midst is Sadaisha Shimmers, a vision of gaudy fabulousness. The lights adorning her neck, fingers and head are bouncing off dozens of blue and white rhinestones attached to her face. Clad in fishnets and a black and white one-piece bathing suit, Shimmers disrupts the intimate conversation before she even reaches the table.

“Hi, I’m Sadaisha, Peachy’s Puffs’ first drag queen. I’ve got something to suck, something to blow, something to chew and not just on me but on my lovely tray. Candy, cigars, cigarettes, vibrating cock rings – all the necessities.”

Peachy’s Puffs Cigarette & Candy Girls are known on sight by anyone accustomed to frequenting San Francisco’s clubs and bars. Started in the 1980s by the original Puff Peachy D’Ambrogio, Puffs provide a uniquely San Francisco service. They’re the ones dressed like flight attendants and bellboys trying to convince you to buy a candy bar or pack of cigarettes from their tray for a whole lot more than you would pay at the corner liquor store.

The sky is just beginning to fade from inky black to early morning gray, but there is already a crowd gathered and lined up eager to enter their favorite house of worship, the Endup’s Sunday morning “church.” Emily Fihn, 25, saunters to the front. She manages to gracefully hug the doorman despite the 20-pound tray hanging around her neck and is immediately waved past the velvet rope. Though it’s 7:30 a.m. the club is bumping as if it were still Saturday night and for most of the crowd it still is.

Fihn works every Sunday morning from 6 a.m. to noon at the Endup. This is usually preceded by a Saturday night stint lasting sometimes until 4 in the morning.

“There are days when I’m just dead on my feet,” she says. “But I love my End-Up shift. It’s mostly regulars that I see every week, who will only buy from me, even though the bar sells cigarettes cheaper.”

That kind of customer loyalty is key when every product is ridiculously overpriced.

Novelty items such as vibrating penis lighters and flashing pendant necklaces sell for around $15. But it’s the prices of everyday essentials like candy and cigarettes that make customers gasp.

A candy bar off the tray will cost you $4, while cigarettes total in at a whopping $8 per pack. But before you attack the poor Puff carrying the tray all night, consider the source of this inflation.

The company sells the goods to them at a marked-up price; they in turn need to sell it on the streets for even more to turn a profit. On an average night a Puff can expect to bring in $250 for the company and $100 for herself, and that’s after five hours of walking through the city in heels.

Shimmers considers the lofty price tag on items a part of the Peachy experience.

“People are not going to pay $4 if they’re just buying the candy bar. They’re paying for you and for the entertainment. Because we’re selling ourselves, we’re selling our charisma and our talent.”
Puffs are encouraged to chat and flirt with every person in the bar, whatever it takes to make that dollar. Legend has it that Peachy herself would walk up to people, stick an unwrapped lollipop in their mouths and demand a full payment.

In fact the training video each newbie must watch includes lessons in makeup and mingling, among other things. Peachy’s wants the Puffs to be seen as an image, a cartoon character.

“I usually hire girls who have some sort of acting experience, or have been on stage,” says Peachy’s Puffs manager Stephanie Simon. Once a Puff herself, Simon is now in charge of the office. Her duties now include networking with club owners and overseeing the employees. “It’s not necessarily about looks, you have to have a certain personality to be able to do this kind of job.”

It’s Lizzey Solomon’s first time. The office of Peachy’s Puffs feels like the backstage of a hot play or even a strip club. Giddy laughter and banter clash loudly with the Madonna CD playing on the stereo. The Puffs stand along mirror lined walls fixing their hair and makeup while some sample new flashy outfits for everyone’s approval. The virgin Puff tries on costume after costume before deciding on a red, marching band inspired ensemble, complete with gold braiding and hat. She nervously counts the items in her tray, pausing every few minutes to watch the others or refresh her lipstick for the umpteenth time.

“I’ve only been in the city for four months so I had never heard of this before. I just found the ad on Craigslist,” she says looking at her inventory list with a frown.

Before the shift starts exact inventory must be taken of every tray, and then again at the end of the night. The money each Puff brings in is tallied up against how many items they sold, then they receive their cut. Bonuses can be reached by selling a certain amount of one particular item such as 50 lollipops or 15 lighters. But on Solomon’s maiden run she has more pressing concerns than pricing.

“I don’t know how to go to the bathroom if I need to, I mean with this giant tray what do I do?”

While every Puff claims to love the job and gushes about how amazing it is that they get paid to go to clubs, the majority have only been working there for a few months. According to former Puff Yuen Chiang, not many Puffs can stick it out for long.

“It’s a tough job. There are three types of girls that work there: the ones who anticipated a romanticized version of it, which is wearing cute outfits, meeting boys and being the center of attention…girly girls. Then there are the hard-core hipsters and rockers. I’ve seen only the more tough girls make it long here and they usually bitch and complain about life and Peachy’s. Then there are the ones going through transitional phases and are desperate for work, like me.”

Very few use Peachy’s as a means of supporting themselves. Most have other jobs, student loans or parents willing to let them stay at home a few years longer. As one put it, “Puffing to pay the rent is very hard.”

Most Puffs have a story of some harassment they have dealt with while on the job, whether it’s people stealing from the trays, inappropriate drunken groping or just plain nastiness.

“This woman was buying a necklace and her brother kept telling her not to spend the $30,” says Shimmers recalling the night of her worst incident to date. “When she gave me the money I put it in my cleavage, where I always keep the money. He snatched the necklace from her hands, threw it on my tray, reached in my shirt and pulled out the money. Then he spit in my face.”

So why would anyone put herself through all this when she could easily make better money waiting tables or even stripping?

“With waitressing you’re always getting drink orders and running back and forth. Here I get to drink and flirt and dance with boys all night and have fun,” Shimmers explains. “I’ll sit down with someone and have a drink with them, and chit chat with them for 20 minutes. But they’re going to buy something when I walk away. You gotta have fun and have a personality, but in the back of your mind you always have to remember, ‘I’m here to sell something’.”

Contact Gravagno at ameliagr@sfsu.edu